


thirty-eight and a half beats

by lunamarii



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Depression, Drabble, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Suicidal Thoughts, Unreliable Narrator, no beta we die like tommy in this fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-27
Updated: 2020-12-27
Packaged: 2021-03-11 04:54:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 358
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28369455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lunamarii/pseuds/lunamarii
Summary: Tommy's always loved music. But at the end of it all, it's quiet.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 53





	thirty-eight and a half beats

**_one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight._ **

Tommy’s fingers tapped an incessant yet consistent rhythm on the side of the dirt block he was sat on.

**_one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight._ **

Tommy had always loved music. It was hard to not at least tolerate it when you grew up around Wilbur, and his older brother had eventually taught him how to count the beats to songs he wrote. From then on, Tommy was constantly tapping out beats whenever he could. In fact, one of Tommy’s favorite childhood memories was him and Wilbu–

_don’t think about Wilbur, he’s not here anymore._

**_one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight._ **

And then there were the discs. Far, Cat, Blocks, all were in 4/4, while Mellohi was in 3/4, a waltz. He remembered sitting on the bench one day, trying to explain the difference in time signatures to Tubbo.

_Tommy waves his hands around excitedly. “No ‘cause like you see, a waltz goes like ‘one, two, three’ and all the other ones go-”_

_“Tommy, big man, if I’m being perfectly honest, I haven’t understood a single thing you’ve said,” Tubbo says, cutting him off. Tommy stares at him blankly._

_“You’re a dumbarse.”_

_“Shut up–” Tubbo shoves him, and they both burst out laughing._

God, he hadn’t spoken to Tubbo in ages, and he really should–

_Tubbo doesn’t want you around anymore, he exiled you, he hates you._

**_one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight._ **

It was colder up here than he’d thought it would be, and the wind was uncomfortably sliding under his shirt where there were rips and tears. There were a lot of stars out tonight, and being so far out from L’manberg, he could see them all. They were beautiful; it almost made him want to stay alive. Almost.

Tommy wondered how many beats it would take until he hit the ground.

**_one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight._ **

**_one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight._ **

**_one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight._ **

**_one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight._ **

**_one, two, three, four, five, six, sev–_ **

**Author's Note:**

> Holy fuck. If anyone has made it this far, thank you so much! This is the first fic I've written for the dsmp and mcyt in general. I hope to write a longer fic at some point, but for now, have this drabble I wrote in like an hour.  
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/lunamarii__/)
> 
> [reddit](http://reddit.com/u/borderline_alive)


End file.
